between here and there


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Moving Forward

winter from my house

winter from my house

It’s winter here in Montana. Drama in the sky. Snow falls and everyone moves into action, building a fire or digging out their skis.

For me, I have a break from teaching Remote Studio. I’m settling into Bozeman. Really , a new hometown for me after leaving Livingston and moving between Jackson Hole and Louisiana last year.

For 2013, after a 2 month disconnection by blog.com, I am back to posting. If you follow me, you will also notice the categories of the blog have expanded to include my paintings and other work.

Stay tuned …..


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Listening and Learning

making into the world

making into the world

There are different ways to learn something, place, or body. Scientific thinking, which rules our educational programs, values discursive knowledge above other types of knowing. Learning from the outside never worked for me, I could never retain the facts very well because they seemed unconnected from life. Data just seemed it was always from the outside and I couldn’t make sense of the information. Deep knowledge, a type of learning that engages us in our senses, emotions, and intuition works for me. This knowledge stays with me and adds to who I am and how I relate to and understand the world. It’s an obvious connection that I teach from an immersive education platform.
This past month I discovered John Mayer. Yes, I know. He’s an international pop star. But I don’t listen to the radio really. In my search for guitar and lyric driven music I thought I would try him out. After a month of listening to all of his early music – a lot . I moved on to his most recent album/disc/collection…which – as the critics say – is different from his previous music. This is true in many ways. For me the time with Mayer’s music is all about learning how another artists crafts their reality through their art. Architect, poet, painter or musician, we all build a world through the art we make. We build off of each other too, borrowing sensibilities, quoting each other , referencing our own work back again. The immersion in another artist can be a mediation for us to muse from.
As far as Mayer, it is his song number 6, Born and Raised, that is Jackson Hole this fall. Melancholy. The days of half light. Slow moving after the tourists have gone. Moose drinking from Fish Creek. Reminding me of the late 70s when JH was “discovered”‘by those who made the place what we experience today. I meditate on the feeling of JH and what it means to me as a place while driving down the road and listening to this tune. Give it a listen.
Within all of this immersion is my own art. I began painting again in January. After many years of not painting. In Louisiana the work was all sunlight reflecting off of water. It was the Tao te Ching. In Bozeman my work has been like a bullet ricocheting off of hard surfaces. But it is coming to rest now. I have moved from smaller works on paper to large paintings. The one attached to this blog I just started. It’s about 7’x8’. I am learning what the work is about. But I cannot really tell you in words yet. Maybe I could play it on guitar, though.


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Warning Signs

knitting, Wilson, Wyoming

knitting, Wilson, Wyoming

 

Ah, yes….it’s that time of year again. Make sure your loved ones are outfitted in blaze orange if they are going to be wandering around in the wilderness!


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Living the gray

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Revelations arise through many avenues. Sometimes they come quietly when we are on our own, until bam! The power for potential change is revealed. Sometimes it is our friends who point out an obvious quality in ourselves we fail to recognize on our own. Or maybe we know this quality but we simply do not give it much thought, because we simply are who we are.

I credit a friend to the recent consideration of my “black and white” point of view. Is it too extreme? Am I missing out on other possibilities in life because choices, positions and decisions seem so clearly “to be” or “not to be”? And it’s not that I align myself with anyone else’s sense of black and white, right or wrong. I simply have my own point of view.

I know this practice and way of seeing the world serves professional accomplishments. But what is the outcome for our personal lives when we are living within the mushiness of another’s sense of the world, timing and spirit ? The either/or view of the world seems ultimately Limiting when living in relation to another. Even when looking from the outside with respect to social conventions of what’s acceptable behavior, the over simplification of choice , when taken to the extreme “good” or “bad” seems never rich enough for life’s unfolding expression. Perhaps the black and white of choice is a matter of survival when we find ourselves on a tricky path.

The last month or so I have been challenging my decision process , stretching choice between black and white to feel what living in the gray is like. Gray is certainly a more muddy, less clear sense of reality than I normally choose. Gray gives us longer to consider choices. Living the gray broadens the sense of understanding in the world. And it can reassign the poles of black and white with other truths. Living the gray is messy, more inclusive, less simple. Living the gray is like singing a note and holding it as long as possible to feel what that note can become as it is sung.

Living the gray is living in a world where past limits fall away to new truths. Where the separation between earth, water, and air vanishes.

 


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The Magic Within Us

tetons

tetons

Remote studio starts tomorrow. I take a last summertime drive along the Tetons – a Sunday drive as a matter of fact. The pace is slower through Teton National Park than along the highways, purposefully slower for the wildlife. For our safety. Slower for our souls if we choose to let the pace seep into us. Parked along a Snake River overlook I watch the sun moving westerly across the blue sky. In a few hours the Tetons will be bathed in the pink light of sunset that I have grown to love. The seconds of magic light from day to night. We all have this magic within us if we choose to recognize it. To see the world in another way than we see most days. To gift ourselves the day. To hear the tires on asphalt as a type of music with pause created by the space between cars and the overtone of wind as it moves past ears. Magic music….

I am thinking about magic and the inner vision that the students bring with them when they come to Remote Studio. Their vision, their magic, is manifest in the things they create while here. Mostly we see the magic in the work that comes from their projects for the semester. These explicit creations mark the way they see the world, become the marks of their reality. These things they are asked to share with others, with the community. But for me, it is not only the vessels and the architecture they design and build that brings a smile to my face. It is that they share the magic of their vision in casual ways, little ways, that surprise me.

The Remote Studio “facility” is nothing grand. I can’t even refer to it as quaint. But the students bring magic to the place. And sometimes they even leave marks upon it in case we are a bit lost to find the magic ourselves. There are two written notes left by two different students that make me smile every time I think about them. One is on a utility closet door that springs open when you push it. Taped to the outside of the door are the words: Narnia in here. The other is more recent and serves as our address marker on the road. Written in orange marker on a small wood stake is our street address: 625. Following the numbers is the phrase: somewhere between here and there.

We choose to live by magic. We choose to see beyond the everyday. We choose to hold on to the magic within us. We choose how to live everyday.


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Day Falling

end of day sun

end of day sun

When does house become home? When we build it, furnish it, decorate it? spend a season or years in it? Cook, clean and make “to-do” lists in it? Make the beds and hang the art? Listen to music or make the music that dwells between the walls? When we live time in it? Make memories and love in it? Leave it and return?

I knew this once. Where to find home. Home came easy. Seemed easy when I was younger. Now I look for home everywhere and it seems to be nowhere. Home is peace. I think home must be when I breath in and out. I must practice. Breathing in and out. And maybe then home will appear before me in the time between breaths.


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love and landscape

Summer is here in Gallatin Valley and we race to meet it before it passes.

I had a hike up the Gallatin Mountain trail this evening. The valley below tells its story of the day. The fields of mature seed-heads, be it weeds or wheat are dry and brittle. The waterways move down-land in curls of green trees, flowering plants and berries. Heat rises into the smoky haze of the sky. I stood and looked over the valley, its beauty, and thought of our briefness. The moment passes into memory, then a poem, moving on to remembrance of another women’s life.

The poem, “To An Athlete Dying Young,” belongs to A. E. Housman…. it is the poem’s end that lives in my memory:

And round that early-laurelled head 
Will flock to gaze the strengthless dead,
And find unwithered onits curls

The garland briefer than a girl’s.

I look across the valley floor before me, the valley of Africa – only ever an experienced in film – is recovered from a memory gained years ago. I am now thinking about Isak Dinesen and the path her love took when living in Africa. The years of love for one man known. The path of friend recognized through as many experiences as could be taken or allowed, life-long lover, loss and longing, patience, and ultimately the arrival of perfect timing. Dinesen must have thought the universe played some cruel joke when her lover was killed on his way to her as she waited one windblown day. Looking to the valley floor below I see the plain of Africa. Windswept and dusty. Dry and fearless.

Timing is the universe’s folly. From its space we live together or apart. In response to our inability to control time we often choose limitations instead of taking the opportunities that are living with us. Dennison was a brave person to choose love with imperfect timing. She chose a dynamic life, ever changing, never definite, discoverable but not pre-known.

Love and landscape. Memory and timing. Living and bravery. Life speeds by and with the closing of the night our head hits pillow. Timing. The moment passes to years before the morning comes.


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The simplicity of imagination

 

 

IMG_1854

 
IMG_2307 IMG_2316 IMG_1839 One of the design components for this summer’s Remote Studio was a tree fort. This is one of the coolest forts you can imagine. It is beautiful and fantastical. At the open house the children ran rampant, jumping and screeching as children do. The tree fort and the companion vessel were a hit.

What I have grown to value from these experiences is what impresses these young imaginations most. Not the dynamic architecture. But the simplest of experiences. The opportunity for them to engage with the physicality of the Earth and each other.

The tree fort has a simple pulley system with a bucket at the end of a rope. The children immediately gravitated to the bucket and pulley. Giggles and laughter , dirt and rocks, up and down it went the entire play time.

Joy and laughter for children is found in the abundance of the simplicity of life. We often forget this when considering the needs of children. And we forget this for ourselves. The feel of the rock in our hand before we toss it into the air or across the water, the smell of dirt after a rain. The joy of a full moon on a summer night. Joy and laughter plain and simple. Life.


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The rear view

 

rear view

rear view

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Why is it we look to the past to measure ourselves , our lives? We look to the past and find our fears for the future. Looking into the mirror tonight as I drive home I see the place I have come from. The past. The brilliance of a Bozeman sunset. The rain of fuscia across the sky. The lace of intense light on the edge of clouds. Brilliance to be sure. Purples gain over pinks and orange and my day passes into intensity of night and darkness. All of this is just behind me. I know these now and can fear I may never experience such brilliance again. I can stay where I am and dwell on the past. The setting sun. And another day. Or I can continue to drive forward into the darkness of night, the unknown, appreciating my experience of what passes. I choose to not fear what I do not know of the future when looking into the past, to search for the truth of a future I do not know. Looking into the past to verify the future is the trap of our fears, not the embrace of the songs of our life we have yet to write. Night comes and the stars of the universe rise .


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Fodder for Fire

whats left over

whats left over

 

The snow has melted in Jackson Hole. Debris from tearing down a structure and building two Remote Studio projects show us that even conscientious builders produce more waste than we would aspire to. Separating out materials again: plywood, larger nominal members, caustic materials, and finally everything that could transform into firewood for heat this fall and winter.

the work

the work

How many times can scraps from one project be re-purposed for a next use? The next use no less graceful than the previous if the material finally finds purpose.

ready for winter

ready for winter